Be thankful for what you have; and you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have; you will never ever have enough. – Oprah Winfrey
I admit I never liked who I was before, in fact I never liked the way my life had been before. I was bullied all throughout my life, I’ve been to multiple failed relationships, people that I love seem to walk away from me, I don’t have any happy childhood memories. In short, my life was a complete mess, I was lonely and really alone. To cope for the emptiness that I’ve been feeling, I tried to search for things that I don’t have in my life, people whom I never met and will never meet. I thought that way I could be happy, if I could only get those things I would eventually be happy and contented with my life. I have been like that all throughout my life. I kept on searching for things that I don’t have hoping that it will fill the emptiness that my heart had been feeling. And if don’t find the things that I am looking for I would always feel irritated to a point where I would blame other people for what had happened to my life and why I can’t have the things that I want.
I am now in my 30’s, it is only recently that I learned that the reason why my life is a complete mess is simply because I let it be that way. I invited negativity into my life and that’s how my life would be. I forgot that life can be simple all you have to do is to be thankful and contented for the things that you have, for the people in your life whom you met that had thought you a lot. I regret the times that I spent sulking, getting angry, irritated and blaming people for the way my life turned out to be. Slowly, I am trying to change the course of my life. I know I am in my 30’s but somehow I hope that it is not too late to change my life and chase after my dreams. One step at a time, I will drop my negative attitudes and change it into a more positive outcome. I know it will never be easy because me being on the negative side had already been a habit that’s not easy to remove. But for now, I just want to be thankful that I am still alive and was able to realized that I can still change for the better of myself.